Wednesday, June 5, 2013

What's My Age Again?

Lately I have been feeling like I am at this awkward age in life where nothing seems to be like the right move to make.  I am too old to want to live at home, yet too young to be able to support myself.  And all of my hopes and dreams seem to be years down the road.

I am 22 years old.  I have graduated college, I am going to grad school, and I work part time with kids. I feel like I should be way past all of this.  I feel like I should have my own place, my own friends here in Florida, and should be falling in love (that may be because I was just at a wedding).

But instead I feel stuck.  I feel like I am still that college girl who Mom and Dad still support (which I am BEYOND grateful for).  I just don't feel like the adult I thought I would be by this point in my life.  

If you had asked me 4 years ago right after my high school graduation where I thought I would be it would be completely different from where I am now.  I thought I would at least have a ring on the finger, if not married.  I would have a legit job that I was in love with, and I would be making decisions about my life without having to talk 4689264 people about it.

But I am not there.  And yes I know I should love where I am at and enjoy my time being young.  But I cannot help but desire away the years and move onto being an "adult".  

Time goes by so fast.  I am constantly reminding myself to live in the moment and remember every little detail.  And when the time is right everything will fall into place.  I am a firm believe in the idea that everything happens for a reason.

And maybe my reason for not being where I thought/want to be is that God has a much grander plan for me than I can even imagine!  And I know that to be true.  And I know that when the time comes I will look back on my life and be thankful it did not come any sooner than it did.

But friends I need your help a bit.  Prayer for becoming content with my life would be great.  If I have learned nothing else I have learned that through faithful prayer I will become satisfied.

And one day I will look back on this post and laugh.  I will have come to where I want to be and be grateful for this time of my life.


Amy said...

I will absolutely be praying for you Mosby!! I completely understand where you're coming from. Something I learned after college is that EVERYONE is struggling with not being where they thought they would. The friends with the awesome jobs may be lacking a core group of friends. The friends with the great group of friends might be lacking a significant other. And the friends with the great relationship may be looking for the perfect job. It's hard to not be overwhelmed by the things we thought we would have that we don't, but just keep in mind that we're alll feeling like that! Love you girl!

gayle @ grace for gayle said...

Prayers for you. It sounds like you are trying to keep perspective, even when that perspective is hard to come by. I encourage you to keep looking deep into this, and don't compare yourself to anyone else -- NOT EVEN TO YOURSELF! :) I had to learn this, very much the hard way. Life NEVER turns out how we think it will, so walking through this season and prayerfully asking God to help us to not be disappointed, but embrace our "today" is hard--but worth it. I agree with Amy, who commented before me. Head up, girl, you're a daughter of the King no matter WHERE you are!!!

Gayle | Grace for Gayle

Olivia said...

I can totally relate to you on this. I am 22 also, and even though I have a baby and do live on my own, it still doesn't seem like I'm where I wanted to be when I was in high school and looking into the future. I think we do definitely need to be grateful for this "in between" time, our future husbands will find us soon enough ;)

Melody M. said...

Mosby, I have felt like this so many times myself. I don't know if you've ever heard of the conference put on by Lara Casey of Southern Weddings and Emily Ley called "Making Things Happen," but I think it would be perfect for you! I've been myself and had a wonderful time. It is very pricey, but a lot of times they offer scholarships to those that want to attend. Let me know if you want to know more!

Miss Riss said...

Guuurl you are in good shape, you don't even know! =) No worries, you are doing everything the right way! Talking to a million people before making decisions is always good, it means you're informed. And I didn't have a "big girl" job until halfway through grad school. Everything will come in it's time. Love ya girly!!